[S5E11] Last Cigarette Ever
The gang agrees to have "one last cigarette" as the sun rises, but Future Ted reveals it took years for each member of the gang to actually quit, listing events in their lives that lead to the change: Lily quits the day she decides to try to get pregnant; Marshall quits the day his son is born; Robin quits in June 2013; Barney quits in March 2017; and Ted quits two weeks into dating the children's mother.
[S5E11] Last Cigarette Ever
Of course, with any other sitcom we'd be yelling inconsistency. For How I Met Your Mother? It's just another classic example of Future Ted distorting the stories for his kids. Plus, if you're telling a story, how often does smoking a cigarette come up anyways? Like we said, with any other sitcom, this episode would have never worked, but we enjoyed this episode.
Meanwhile, Robin is joined by a new co-anchor, Don Frank, a legend of the pre-6am television world, having broadcast in 39 media outlets. Impressed at first, Robin is quickly disappointed by Don's lack of professionalism or concern, or even pants. She works even harder to prove that her job means something, even booking Mayor Bloomberg on the show. Don tells her to stop taking her job so seriously, and amidst her retorts, he reveals that the Mayor canceled. As she begins to light up a cigarette on air in defeat, the gang calls from the apartment, pleading for her not to break their pact. She agrees, but when she returns to the apartment, she finds everyone smoking on the roof. Future Ted tells the audience in the voice-over that Robin and Don were dating within three months.
I went looking back through season 4 for references to the ricin cigarette. I found the confrontation between Jesse and Walt (about 28 mins in S4E12 "End Times") where Jesse actually accuses Walt of getting Saul to lift the ricin cigarette. He says Saul called him into the office, but, did we ever actually see that meeting?
Robin: I'm gonna go up on the roof and stand there by myself for five minutes.Ted: Have fun.Future Ted: [v.o.] And that's exactly what she did. She just stood there. All right, kids, I'm gonna level with you. That's not what she did. Here's what she did.Robin: All right, all right. I'm going to go have a cigarette.[2030:]Son & Daughter: What?Future Ted: I promised her I'd never tell you this, but once upon a time, your Aunt Robin did enjoy the occasional cigarette, and occasionally that occasional cigarette was more than just occasional.
Ted: Hey, guys, look, the sun's coming up.Robin: You know what right now is a perfect time for? A last cigarette ever. No, I mean, a real last cigarette ever.Barney: Damn it, let's do it.Ted: Okay.Marshall: All right. Last cigarette ever on the count of three.Ted: One...Lily: [raspy voice] ...two...Robin: ...three.Future Ted: [v.o.] We all quit for a while after that, but it wasn't anyone's last cigarette. We did eventually all quit smoking for real. Robin's last cigarette was in June, 2013. Barney's last cigarette was in March, 2017. Lily's last cigarette was the day she started trying to get pregnant. And Marshall's last cigarette was the day his son was born. And my last cigarette? Two weeks into dating your mother. And I never looked back.
It has yet to be revealed how exactly Brock was poisoned, but nevertheless the facts remain that Walt orchestrated the ricin cigarette to be lifted from Jesse in order to help prove this idea, along with planting the fake in the Roomba to convince him that he had nothing to do with the poisoning in the first place.
Though the episode revolves around nicotine addiction, it approaches the topic playfully and realistically. It ends with the narrator sharing when each member had their last cigarette, and Ted's two weeks into dating his future wife. This episode is a winner if only for its liberal use of Lily's gravelly smoker voice.
Boyd sits in his office, toying with the the cigarette pack he'd caged off Teri, when Carl and Jimmy walk in. Boyd explains that he has to meet with Wynn and Picker and explain to then how half the heroin shipment came to be lost. Carl says "We didn't lose it!" Boyd knows that will not be a productive tack to take whatever dope remains and instructs his men to "hide it somewhere that God can't even find it." It's Boyd's life insurance policy against an unfortunate outcome to the upcoming meeting. He elicits a promise from his two retainers to see that Ava gets whatever heroin she needs to have the nurse smuggle into the prison. He thanks them for their bellicose willingness to accompany him to the meeting, but declines their offer. "I appreciate the sentiment, but this one's on me." They leave as Boyd reminds Jimmy of his promise.
It's the crucial Top Four challenge! Everybody has something to prove today: Jinkx and Roxxxy are vying for dominance in total wins, and it's Alaska and Detox's last chance to catch up. Coco and Alyssa are gone, Ivy and Jade and Lineysha and everybody else are gone, and we're down to ...Rolaskatox and Jinkx.
RuPaul turns serious, and tells Alaska, "You've been criticized for being a little rough around the edges." Has Ru been watching a different show than me? Because if my memory serves, Alaska got raked over the coals mid-season for being too polished-one-note, and correct me if I'm wrong, but weren't we eight challenges into the season, when she hit the runway in that "Red: For Filth" look, that she was rewarded for finally looking a little rougher? Whatever, maybe RuPaul is confusing Alaska's critiques with somebody from last season.
It all culminates in the line finessed by Michael Ginsberg (the word "mistress" can't be in the ad) and delivered by Don in SCDP's pitch: "Jaguar: At last a thing of beauty you can truly own." That last word deserves some explication. Yes, in the presentation, Don likens the temperamental beauty of the Jaguar to a woman, but the whole point of the proposal is that, as everyone knows, a woman can't be "owned." A car can. I only mention this because I've seen a few commentators claim that "The Other Woman" is an episode about "men trying to own women," and I think that's a bit simplistic. OK, men might wish they could "own" women on some level, but not even Don Draper or Roger Sterling -- not even Pete Campbell, fer chrissakes -- really believes that is possible in 1967. 041b061a72